It’s been another year.
365 days have passed since the last time we were here, saying Happy Anniversary.
525600 minutes since the last time we celebrated this day.
This day that marks the day we said “I do.”
This day since we said our vows and promised forever.
One whole year.
If you’ve read my past posts, you’ll come across one that I wrote detailing how my husband and I met. In short, it was at a grocery store and a conversation about Mass Effect ensued.
We’ve been married now for six years. That’s what happens when time passes and you’re living your life day-to-day.
It is crazy to me that it has been six years, that this year is 2018, and that I am now 26 years old.
Where the hell did all that time go?
It rushes past us without us barely even noticing.
Pictures allow us to travel back in time and relive moments. Pictures and memories are all that we have to cling to our past and the time that has passed.
But the day-to-day is just as important as those pictures and major memories that we hold on to.
On a typical day, we wake up at six in the morning, we shower, we get ready for work, we feed and take out the pets, and we leave for work. Once our shifts are over, we come home, make dinner, play video games or read, and go to sleep.
Rinse and repeat.
We do not go on exciting adventures. We do not have children. We do not live lives of luxury.
We simply are.
Yet, so many don’t make it this far.
Marriages crumble before they ever mold together.
That is why we receive this question so frequently:
What do you guys do to make it work?
People seem to think that I’ve cast some sort of magical enchantment to get my husband to help me around the house or laugh at my stupid jokes. They would rather believe in hocus pocus than the power of marrying your best friend.
What DO we do?
I am the youngest of six children. I have grown up in a broken home and did not have a solid couple as role models for what marriage should look like.
Yet, I knew what kind of husband I wanted: I wanted him to be my best friend.
So when I met my husband and we got to know one another over a couple of months, I thought I was really close.
After a few months of dating, I realized that I had met my best friend.
In that moment, I knew what I had. I had found the one whom I wanted to keep by my side for the rest of my life.
Not at all. When it comes to building a relationship, it is important to think about what is going to keep that relationship going.
Obviously love can fade. Children can cause marital problems. Shit happens.
So what keeps a marriage together?
Being with someone that you can laugh with, share everything with, and have a connection to regardless of what happens in your day-to-day lives.
Simply being there for the other person through every step, every stone, every boulder that life throws at you.
Supporting them, caring for them, empowering them, and being there for them.
Being selfless when it comes to the well being of the person you share your life with.
Why doesn’t that work all the time?
Because our innate nature is to be selfish. To care more for us, our well being, our self worth, our little minds – so much that we can’t look to caring for anyone besides our own self.
That, my friends, is true love.
To give of yourself for someone else without expecting anything in return.
That’s how we do it.
And that’s how we will do it for the rest of our lives.
So Happy Anniversary, my love.
Here’s to six more years and six more years after that and after that and after that…
May my enchantment be one that holds your forever.