Posted in Marriage, Opinion, The Laughing Box, The Real Life

The Struggle of a Controlling Personality

There are many issues I face with being conflicted with a need to control everything but I will try to focus on only a few for today.

Getting into other’s business

This is the most “fun” because, as a woman, we enjoy to gossip… Well, I can take that gossiping too far. I end up trying to control (what a nasty word) what, whomever I am gossiping over, is doing or saying or thinking. It really is that bad.

It isn’t like I mean to, it just happens.

When someone does something stupid my first thought is, “Why did they do that?” And then I go into all of the logical reasons they should not have done that stupid thing they did. I mean they have to know it was dumb, right?

Not my business.

Not my place.

I think this control derives from what I wrote about a few days ago; the need to be heard. I want to be heard SO badly that I try to control what people say, what they think, and how they live their lives. Like it really effects my life. Which it doesn’t.

What you do makes no impact on how I live my life. But when you act like an idiot (ooh that is mean), I feel like you should know.

I am just being honest here.

Saying hurtful things

I try not to lie. I have tried to keep lies from escaping my mouth for several years now because I realized that no one benefits from a lie. Therefore, I am af78adfd2fc3c164acb98ff438f69b57f fairly honest (sometimes brutally) to people. I have a pretty good hold on my filter (hahaha, sometimes) and don’t say everything that comes to mind.

Even if I am not saying something my tone is often interpreted in the correct way. So my words do not reflect the tone I use when I say what my filter tells me to say.

So when I think that a person is being a complete prat, I won’t actually say, “Hey you’re being a jerk and a half!” even though I am thinking it. Instead, I will say something MUCH more pleasant but it can have an edge to it and might upset the person.

Ugh, people are TOO sensitive.

Maybe that is the problem, everyone is too         sensitive to the truth. I think I am on to something.

Moving on.

Trying to get people to see the world through my eyes (live life like I do)

This is not okay.

My best friend has commented many times on my “judgey” behaviors. I have gotten better but it is a struggle that I deal with everyday.

This isn’t me trying to say that I live a perfect life or that I don’t make mistakes or that I am all knowing. I want people to see the world through my eyes because 1) I would be heard, and 2) they could see what makes me happy.

I am not trying to say that everyone gets happiness in the same way that I do… Not at all.

BUT if people focused more on the positive things in life (be GRATEFUL) then their outlook on the world would hold a more “happy” perspective.

Again, that’s just me.

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I can’t think of anything else that I do that is just awful. Let me know controlling behaviors you have in the comments!

 

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